Recently, I was browsing for some blog images, and several were of people in obvious sadness or regret. I don’t know if the photos were staged or real, but I was reminded of my former self etched in each photograph. I was reminded of the shame I use to carry (even after being born-again).
What is shame? The dictionary says it is the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous, etc. done by oneself or another. So relateable. And now my number one reason for telling people who they are IN CHRIST.
Shame is real.
But the torture of shame is how the enemy repeatedly replays in our mind the things we wish we could reverse. This is why Paul said, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit” (Romans 8:1). Paul could have just as easily said, “There’s now no [shame] to those who are in Christ Jesus…” and it would mean the same thing. The Greek word for condemnation literally describes the verdict of a sentence pronounced. Or we could call it harsh judgment (specifically against oneself).
In the previous chapter of Romans, Paul describes feeling frustrated with his own actions. He said, “I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate… I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway” (Romans 7:15,19, NLT). Sound familiar? It did to me. I’ve been in that wrestling match more times than I want to count. And I could even relate to Paul’s final words: “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” (verse 24).
Our words might be slightly different now, but you get the picture. He was ashamed. He hated himself for the things he had done wrong when he felt like he should have known better.
Been there.
BUT… Thankfully, Paul did know better this time. When the part of him that struggled said, “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” the spirit within him who knew who he was in Christ answered and said (next verse), “Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord!” (Romans 7:25).
AND THAT’S NOT ALL. It may have been the end of that chapter and verse, but the Bible is broken into sections to help us find scripture. The next words of Paul in Chapter 8 are a continuation of his revelation about shame and condemnation in Chapter 7: “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit” (Romans 8:1).
Paul recognized the truth and made a firm decision to say NO to the devil’s lies. And that’s exactly what you and I have to do too.
It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been saved. Satan will always be a liar and his tactics will always be cruel. If he can get you to meditate on your mistakes, he’s tricked you into shame and condemnation all over again. Don’t let him. Don’t fall for it.
“So now there is no condemnation [no shame] for those who belong to Christ Jesus” (NLT). The feeling of shame will knock on the door of your heart, but you don’t have to answer it. Instead of dwelling on feelings of regret, turn your heart and thoughts on to the blood of Jesus that saved you, cleansed you, and set your feet on solid ground.
No matter what you’ve done, or what you’re currently wrestling with, there is help in Christ. YOU my friend, are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus (2 Corinthians 5:21).
Daphne, I love this exercise so much. I’m doing it today….can’t wait to share it with you all!
you’ve got me curious!
Hi Daphne, I have to write this simply because you’re book helped me to realize I wasn’t such a piece of crap that I thought of myself or my grandfather telling me I wasn’t worth the powder to blow me to hell!
I can’t begin to guesstimate how many times I have thought, wondered, begged to know; How did Paul get through that over and over and over! You know Romans 7: 15 +.
For me it’s the rope tied about my neck dragging me deeper and into a cold unspeakable depth over and over again with yet another shame I am brought to remember! I don’t think shame is a Trick ! Rather, it’s attempted murder! Most don’t remember tricks like jokes. Attempted murders one recalls! And you remember & remember and it reinforces it over and over! No matter what it is go ask someone to pray with you about it and preferably more than one! “The Scarlet Letter fades the more exposed it is to Light” It’s something new I am trying rather than ruminating over and over like Paul. That’s starting to help I think. I have heard that confession is good for the soul and haven’t figured that out yet myself.
The biggest helpful first step I’ve found in years was of course your book. Thank you.Too many things seem to take so long and too long I think. I pray and think yours will help so very many to shorten their journeys.
Perhaps it’s public confession that is good for the soul … at high noon … then it can no longer be used against you! Then you can finally begin to grow in your righteousness and the shame will begin to fade?!
Indeed you were a wretched man but finally you’re being freed bit by bit from all that heavy shame being taken off your back! Finally you can stand up. God already knew! =) Thanks for allowing me to say hi! Rick
Thank you Rick. When I was in the depth of my mess, I never dreamed that not only would I find freedom but someday I would be able to help someone else find the same. It blesses my heart to hear your testimony. And Iove that quote: “The Scarlet Letter fades the more exposed it is to the Light.” wow. This is so true!
I’ll also add that I agree with your thoughts on confession. It seems to me, anything brought to the light dramatically loosens the grip darkness had over it. I’ve experienced that myself. Shame, of course, keeps our mouths quiet. But when you find someone trustworthy to share with, the grip of Satan is broken.
Thank you again Rick! God bless my friend :)