Ok, so I have to confess, I enjoy watching certain competition TV shows (not most, just some). One of my past favorites was DesignStar on HGTV. It was clean television and I was intrigued with how they came up with and implemented their design ideas.
But one thing I noticed is that every season had at least one person (if not more) who was over-confident, and let’s just say, a bit prideful. Before any challenge was given, they were the ones tooting their own horn claiming to be the next DesignStar… “You just watch… I’m going to win.”
And every time, they were one of the first to be sent home.
So this brings me to something I want to point out: Don’t mistake the quiet and timid as the only ones who are insecure.
We tend to think that the shy or quiet person is the one who lacks self-confidence and is always uneasy or anxious around others. But this just isn’t a pat answer, or a correct label. In fact, it is often the loudest, most obnoxious, and self-absorbed person who is also the most insecure.
Speaking of the Pharisees, Jesus said, “But all their works they do to be seen by men” (Matthew 23:5). Our automatic assumption is pride –that ugly 5-letter word we are supposed to avoid. And I agree 100%. But I’ve seen this time and time again… when someone is loud and over-stated, it is often an overcompensation to hide the true problem:
They are scared of what you think about them.
In the Book of John, we read: “Nevertheless even among the rulers many believed in Him, but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, lest they should be put out of the synagogue; for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God” (John 12:42-43).
The first picture that comes to mind is men who cowered around the Pharisees and in fear of rejection, did not confess their belief in Jesus. But let me paint a slightly different picture: Suppose there were men there, who for fear of the Pharisees, were loud —not quiet— who boasted that they didn’t need “that Jesus” and joined in the commotion of the Pharisees. Why? So they too could hide behind their fear of rejection.
Insecurity is found just as much in pride, as it is in timidity.
And these issues don’t just occur in the public eye. As a wife, do you cook or clean or create, so your family will give you praise? Or so you can bless them and provide a comfortable and peaceful home?
As a business man, do you buy the latest and greatest gadget or watch or car so others can praise your achievements? Or because you’re grateful God has allowed you to enjoy these blessings?
These are questions to ponder, motives to evaluate, and judgments to reassess. Insecurity is an evil trap and it shows up on everyone’s door regardless of personality. I pray we would all grow in the confidence of who we are in Christ, and that alone would be enough.
