A faith to live by.
A purpose to live for.
A self to live with.
It took me awhile to understand each of these, but I now know without any hesitation that these three are a must (not an option).
“But without faith, it is impossible to please God, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him” (Hebrews 11:6). Obviously, when I first became a Christian, I came to God with a measure of faith. But I understand why Jesus said you only need mustard-seed faith (very small) because that’s literally all I had to give God. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe in God– I didn’t fully believe He would want me (with all my faults, sins, and baggage).
The faith I learned to live by is that God 100% wanted a relationship with me. And that in so many ways, I represented the epitome of why God came to save the world in the first-place. Jesus said those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are weak and sick (Matthew 9:12).
The Bible says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life” (Proverbs 13:12). Hopelessness is an awful state of existence. And a real trap of the enemy. When you only see your faults, you begin to believe the lies that you have nothing good to offer to this world. Right before I got saved, I was a college drop-out. I lost all vision for what I wanted to do with my life because I didn’t have a clear purpose. When I first went to college, I wanted to be in business. I was excited about that goal. But goals without substance don’t last. Without Christ, my life had make-believe substance and after a few dates with the world, I fell into disillusionment.
Thankfully, God gave me a new purpose when I surrendered my heart to Jesus. It wasn’t that I suddenly had a roadmap of what my life would like or had a perfect career path; I just had renewed hope that one day at a time with God would be sufficient. Somehow my heart connected with Heaven and I knew the journey (wherever it took me) would be worth it.
But…
A faith to live by and purpose to live for are of no matter if you don’t have a self to live with.
The biggest obstacle of all was that Daphne didn’t like Daphne. I would go to church and have moments of bliss in the presence of God surrounded by other believers, but as soon as I stepped back out into the world, my self-dislike sucked me into a pit of despair. It’s crazy to think you can be saved and lost at the same time!
“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord” (2 Corinthians 3:18). The last thing I saw when I looked in my mirror was “the glory of the Lord.” Oh no, I saw every flaw, every raw thought, every scar. And I didn’t know how anybody could like (much less love) the girl in my reflection. BUT GOD…
Using the very thing I disliked (and often avoided), God changed my entire perspective when He made me look deeply in my mirror one day. With unwavering insistence, He said, “Tell her you love her and you forgive her.” I’ll never forget that day or that moment.
The weight of self-hate dropped. The bliss of hopefulness filled my lungs. And my faith in a loving God increased measurably. All because I accepted the challenge to forgive ME.
That was 1993. I’ve since learned that gender, race, education, status, and geographical location, make zero difference in these 3 musts for life. Every person needs a FAITH to live by, a PURPOSE to live for, and most definitely a SELF to live with.
Learn more in Daphne’s book, Facing the Mirror: Finding a Self to Live With.
